I’m back on my blog!

For some time I have been thinking about re-writing stuff in my blog. Not too political, or  academically loaded, as the previous few posts of mine, but to start writing about personal experiences and thoughts.

Why now?

Well, firstly, I have the illuminating and inspiring example of one human I am blessed to know, Smilyan Pavlov (link), who is writing openly, honestly, but importantly – on a regular basis. Secondly, there are quite a few events in my life for them to be just ‘passing by’ without a proper attention. Why not on a blog, so that I can see what my surroindings think like?

Why did I not write for more than a year?

There is always the excuse of “I had no time”. But it’s too cheap (right, Smilyan? ^^), and far too easy. The truth is, retrospectively looking, that I have been 'scared’.

Scared of my own 'voice’, to be 'wrong’, and/or 'attacked’, or confronted

A recurring fear of mine. Always scared to underperform, to not be 'perfect’. If you look at my other three posts, they are not perfect, of course, but perfection is sought – I have double, and triple-checked all data I put, with constant citing of respectable sources – like I do not dare to write stuff on my own. All my other posts are easily defendable, and, as profound and well-researched they appeared to be at the time, they offer little to no personal appraisal or points raised. Well, how boring is it if all we do as people is to re-cite what others have already written (or re-quoted themselves?^^). I am inspired to write some of my own thoughts, at the risk of making new “enemies”, or some who 'dislike me’. If they do, who says their views are the 'right’ ones anyway?

What I wanted to share now:

Very recently I packed all my stuff, jumped onto a trian, and off I went from Trento, Italy, to The Netherlands – a new (old) destination, for a new adventure. On one hand, I was struck by how 'trivial’ this seemed to my brain – Alexander, you have done this plenty of times. What’s the big deal?

But it’s quite a deal. What a weird 'trivialty’ that our generation has lived to know, don’t you think? Only a generation or two earlier, this was something unpracticable at best, and unthinkable at worst. How has this become such an often occasion, that one leaves the roots and his surroundings, to change environments completely? Like a snail: with my 'house’ everywhere. That’s how I felt boarding that train with literally all my belongings, all what is dear to me (notably, the two bicycles I love the most :)).

Is this normal?

I don’t know, and I am not looking to give a sweepingly generalising answer. I know it is a fact in my life, (surely in many others’) and will keep observing its effects on me.

What are your thoughts? Feel free to share them, or not, of course.

Enough for now, and thanks for your time!